Corny much

When I was a little innocent kid, friendship was something to me. I was really excited when I was declared as someone's best friend. I was proud and felt loved. As if it was my first ever established relationship to a normal human being other than my family.

From that day onward, friendship means a lot to me.

We sent each other cute cards, cute gifts, cute sayings to remind each other how much we appreciate our  relationship. Just to tell her that I was glad she was my best friend. Corny, I know.

But then, things went bad. And we broke up. I was no longer her best friend.

We didn't manage to save our friendship. The ship sank to the bottom of the ocean and no one was able to go down and pull it to the surface. Either me or her.

We failed. Miserably, without even trying to work things out. Up till now, she's just a friend of mine.Whom I never get in touch with. She's nobody. Not someone special.

As time goes by, I met different kind of people. One who helps me get stronger, one who would rather see my weaknesses instead of strengths, one who I would do anything for, and one who I would care less and more. These are the people who I called friends. People who are different and unique in their own way. Those who have shaped my life.

Many times, my friendships were tested. Many times. I believe it was His plan in making me a better company, a listener, and most importantly a better friend.

A good friend does not mean someone who take care of your feelings and intended to save your friendship by keeping things to him/herself. When something bad happen, you ought to go to your friend so that you can tell them what went wrong. But somehow you keep things to yourself, let it accumulate and explode on one fine day.

Because that's what I did. Or at least that is what I still do.

I have always thought that by keeping things to myself, I am the savior of all the friendships that I have built. Instead of making things worse, I decided to keep it quiet and let it pass and pretending nothing really bothers me. I thought I was being good to my friend. But I was wrong. I have been selfish all along.

For that,dear friends,I am sorry.

Friendship is what matters the most to me. As much as I keep saying I don't care, I don't mind. Please, do read between the lines. Deep down inside, I do care and I do mind. Expressing my own feeling is the hardest thing for me to do. I wanted to look strong but I was fool enough for not realize that I am actually making myself the weakest people on earth.

I know sometimes I give up. On me and my friends. I need your help. As much as I always say I give up, I never really wanted things to go down, for the ship to sink , for our friendship to come to an end.

For now, I know things will get better. Well, they have to get worse before they get better.


I want our ship to sail strong, drifting out across the blue ocean. We'll make it through storm and thunder. Together.



Yeah, corny. I know.